The Christianville Spirit: You, The Word To Avoid

The Christianville Spirit
The Spirit that touches lives
December 10, 2008-TCS # 127
You know when people have verbal fights, what’s the word that starts it? Using a sentence that begins with you; You, as in, “You don’t do this!”, “You don’t do that!”, “You ALWAYS do this!” but, when you say something like that the person your fighting with whether it’s your spouse, brother, mother, or whatever, they feel like they’re being attacked and they need to defend themselves. So, here’s how to talk to them without saying YOU. The major rule to get the message across without saying YOU would be to say I. Like let’s just say that you and your spouse are fighting about the fact that your supposed to do the dishes which she asked you to and your sitting in the recliner watching the football game (now keep in mind, something small things like doing the dishes shows your love for that person) and, she says “You never do the dishes! And I’m sick of doing them!” Well, a different way she could have said this would start it out with “I love it when you do the dishes for me. So, could you please do them for me tonight”? And, with her saying something like that, that would make you want to do more things for her. Now, women shouldn’t be the only ones not saying YOU, the men should also not say YOU. All in all though, without saying you at the beginning of a fight, it will be a smoother one.

Thanks for reading The Christianville Spirit. Small Things like taking out the trash and doing the dishes shows your spouse that you love them.